Came across this post on Facebook, and decided to re-post it here from Thought Catalog.
By Christopher Hudspeth
1. Seeing a bug, then losing track of it and becoming a paranoid prisoner in your own home.
2. Hearing loud slams and bumps while you’re in the shower and imagining it being some type of killer who you’ll have to fight off, soaking wet and butt naked.
3. Thinking that you’ve found a parking space, but as you turn in you discover that a motorcycle, a Volkswagen Bug, or some other vehicle the size of a Hot Wheels car has already occupied the spot.
4. When a sneeze refuses to come out, causing you to look like a fool with a scrunched up face.
5. Waiting to hear from somebody specific and being bombarded by texts & calls from everyone who isn’t that person.
6. When the week feels like: Moooooooooooooonday, Tuuuuuuuuuuueeeesday, Weeeeeeeeeeeednesday, Thuuuuuuuuuursday, FriSatSun.
7. You scan your surroundings. Nobody is near you. You fart. Within three seconds, somebody comes right into the stinky perimeter that you’ve created.
8. Checking your bank account after a night of intoxicated drink purchases.
9. When you microwave frozen food and it’s scorching hot everywhere but the ice cold middle.
10. When Michael Bay acquires the rights to make a film about a franchise that you previously enjoyed.
11. When somebody makes up lies about you, and defending yourself makes you seem guilty – but not defending yourself seems suspicious as well.
12. Getting paid but knowing in advance that your check will be consumed by bills.
13. Entering a parked car on a scorching hot summer day.
14. When gas prices are higher than your GPA.
15. When someone 20+ feet away holds the door open for you, forcing you to jog toward them.
16. The humbling moment when you realize you’re wrong during an argument.
17. Waking up and only having a few minutes left until the alarm will sound.
18. When you wear a good outfit but don’t run into anybody noteworthy all day.
19. When you have to be a douche and shuffle through the bag to confirm that Taco Bell (or any other fast food joint) got your order correct.
20. The feeling of heartburn, self-hate and bubble guts that comes about 5-10 minutes after consuming Taco Bell (or any other fast food joint).
Time to hit the sacks, it’s the last working day for this week! Yay!